We Cried Today

Today has not been a great day. I had it all planned out so that it would go smoothly, but nothing ever really goes as planned. I got up at 5 so that I would have time to shower and spend some time with God before the kids got up, except the girls both got up at 5:05. And they were cranky. They followed me around whining all morning. Then, when I was helping Alexa with something, Ella went upstairs and woke up her brothers. Who really didn't need to get up at 5:45 on their first day of school. By the time we left I was feeling defeated.

At the school, the heath teacher remembered the boys from when they were there two years ago. She was talking to them, and Ty informed her that he hated homeschooling. It was a smack in the face for me. He has always hated school. He hated public school and he hated homeschooling, I knew that. But just to have him say it aloud to someone who doesn't know the whole story hurt.

Kainen has the same teacher for first grade that Ty had. I'm not thrilled about that. She is super nice, but she doesn't believe in answering questions directly. She want's children to figure things out for themselves. So when the giant elf visited their class and the kids asked if it was real, she wouldn't tell them no. After school when Ty and I went in there because he had told me that she said it was indeed real, she still refused to tell him that it was just someone dressed as an elf. Of course, Ty idolized her and believed her over me.

Ty's new teacher seemed really nice. I liked her. I did find out that the boys will eat breakfast at school, so I don't need to feed them in the morning before we leave. This will let them sleep a little longer, but I will have to re-figure our morning routine and change the checklists that I made and laminated for them.

After meeting the teachers, the boys headed out to the playground, and Ella cried. She didn't understand why she wasn't allowed to stay with her brothers or why they couldn't come home with us. I never thought about how hard this would be for her. Alexa didn't care, but Ella cried, so I cried. We cried and walked back to the van together. Ella cried all the way home, I carried her into the house and she sat on the couch and cried for the next hour. It broke my heart.

After such a stressful morning, I would love nothing more than to take a nap, but with as tired as the girls are, they are refusing to sit still. I'm planning on giving them a bath and hoping that they will lay down after they are clean.

Pray for us. We need it.

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